“Patriot” Day 2014

I’ve never given much thought to this day, but I think the quotes are appropriate as it is as misnamed as the “Patriot” Act.

So be a good “patriot” and obey your government without question. It knows what’s best for you, after all. Do you want the terrorists to win?

Get Hollywood on the Phone!

It’s obvious Hollywood is bereft of ideas, so it’s banking on remakes and sequels to decades-old movies. If only they’d look to Mother Nature for inspiration.

The plot: An evil corporation (naturally), headed by an even more evil man, secretly brings carnivorous sponges to market. As the body count rises, and more and more people forego bathing, it’s learned that the company did this to boost sales of its deodorants and body sprays. It’s up to a discredited marine biologist to put an end to the carnage.

Remember, when it comes to this kind of movie, you need to throw reason to the wind. The fact that people could just throw their sponges away, or leave them in the sun, is irrelevant.

Ooh! It happens during a freak solar eclipse, so they can’t be left in the sun! This has got SyFy written all over it! Bruce Davison can play the marine biologist.

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What Caliber for Rat?

You might want to have a few pints to calm your nerves before going after one of these guys.

Oh, Hai!

Insert interesting content here.

Happy New Year!

What We Have Here Is a Failure to Communicate

I found this fine piece of English abuse waiting in one of my inboxes at work today. I had to share. Relevant bits of info have been redacted.

Date: Sat, 5 Oct 2013 08:35:02 -0500
Subject: About your website domainname

Good afternoon!

I about your site “Company Name”(domainname.com).

Our seo team aspiration to request to you sending yours traffic to us.
Our team want be felicitous to pay for your traffic. Please contact with us so we could discuss our partnership.

As a representative of the revolutionary project for the sale of music, Our seo team destitution to offer you monetize your project in our affiliate program. The shops is truly revolutionary, the concept and the decision itself have been developed over many years, the conversion of ~  5000 $ with 1k traffic.

If you are interested then you can begin to work with us on a regular basis, this can contact us at the contacts below.

Skype: **********

Thank you. Please only respond to Skype.

Best regards,
Traffic Support Manager TEAM

Rights Aren’t Subject to What Others Might Do

Well, it’s been about four months since I last posted. I figure it’s time to dust of the keyboard.

The news du jour is of course the Washington Navy Yard shooting, in which 12 people were killed and eight wounded. As per some policy stashed away in a filing cabinet in an office building on a planet orbiting Alpha Centauri, fact checking was discarded by major media outlets to enable them to be the first to report on whatever information they could get their grubby little hands on. If it was something they thought would be detrimental to gun rights, it was bolded, italicized and underlined.

Sadly, what closely follows tragic events like this is the horde of people demanding that the government step in and violate the rights of people in no way involved. If you are daring, you can venture into the bowels of this insanity on Twitter. The #guncontrol and the more recent #gunsense (#gunsenseless in my opinion) hashtags are ripe with all manner of anti-gun rhetoric.

Fortunately, there are some brave souls who go in locked and loaded (i.e., armed with facts) to bring some reality to the conversation. They are often stymied, however, by a complete lack of common sense and utter contempt for liberty. That essentially translates to, “I don’t like guns so you can’t have them!”

What people fail to realize, or just don’t care about, is that whenever government takes some action after a tragedy, it will always result in a loss of liberty. Given we just passed the 12th anniversary of the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks, that should be fresh on everyone’s mind. What did we get out of that? The Department of Homeland Security and the Transportation Security Administration. Also: Domestic spying, secret watch lists, invasions of privacy, nudie scanners, invasive patdowns. Basically all Americans are treated as terrorists first.

I really don’t care if some people don’t like guns. They can dislike guns for whatever reasons they want. They have no business demanding that others be stripped of their rights and property, though.

Banning guns with certain cosmetic features, magazines that hold more than an arbitrary number of rounds, cartridges because of some perceived “magical” power or shoulder things that go up will not reduce crime or prevent future tragedies. Requiring background checks for private sales of firearms will not keep guns out of the hands of criminals. All any of those things will do is further infringe on rights protected by the Second Amendment and affirmed by the U.S. Supreme Court. They’re feel good measures that give lawmakers something to shove in the faces of the peons as they scream, “You will submit to my authoritah!”

Control is what gun control is all about.

Where’s the Kaboom?

There was supposed to be an Earth-shattering kaboom.

Oh, there it is.

WordPress for Android: EVOlution in Blogging

I See a New Warning Label

Warning: Do not store rounds in an oven.

How brain dead do you have to be to do something this stupid?

I Want My Baby Back, Baby Back, Baby Back…

Semi-automatic Rock Island Armory .38 Super.

I think they threw semi-automatic in there just to make it sound scary. They’d do whatever they could to make a .25 sound like a vicious assault cartridge.

Don’t Go through the Apocalypse Unprepared

A Siberian company is selling survival kits to help you make it through the end of the world. This should cause you some concern as they obviously haven’t fully grasped the concept.

The kit includes medication, soap, some candles and matches, a can of fish, a pack of buckwheat, a bottle of vodka, a notepad and pencil, a blank ID card and an instruction card with rules to various games. There’s also a rope, which could be used to keep your family together in the ensuing darkness, or possibly to hasten your demise should the vodka run out too soon.

The kit is produced by a bridal party operator in Tomsk, Western Siberia, and can be had for the bargain price of 890 rubles, or about $28.

The company has said the kit is meant to be taken with a pinch of salt, so residents of New York City will have to get Nanny Bloomberg’s permission first.